#3 - Against All Odds

^{This post was originally published in November 29th, 2023 on my now dead Substack blog}

1. Ehrmm hi :3

2. Journey to The Thought Bubble

3. Recommendations

4. Byee

Ehrmm hi:3 

This is awkward. What do you mean, October…is over? That’s not fair, how could it be over already?I barely felt it. NOV-V-VEMBER TOO??!! God dammit. Could we do it again, but this time I get to pay attention and pretend I have enough time for everything? 

No? Ok. It's probably for the best. Let's move on then.

This is a more personal one. But it's also an important part of the comics making process to me, it's just a more emotional mindset type of thing. In a few days I'll have another more technical/analytical post I’ve been preparing, so feel free to skip this storytelling/journal one if that doesn't appeal to you. If you do read it all the way through, please let me know what you thought, and if that’s something you’d like to see more. It helps me understand better who you are as a reader and why you read this newsletter.

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Journey to The Thought Bubble (or Against All Odds)

The festival itself was a blast. I sold books and also some new art I had just finished for the festival - and will be selling online as well. I wanted to have prepared a zine also, but it was a little too much to handle in one month, so I focused on things that were feasible (time management is a must in this line of work, otherwise you end up with a bunch of work you’re not really proud of making because you compromised in time). I do have an idea for a zine that is too nice not to be put into action and now I have access to printing processes I didn't have before and I wanna explore that a little further, so I imagine that zine coming along at some point.

But let's rewind a little.

TTB was the first and only show I attended this year, which makes me a little sad but also I understand that it couldn't have been any different: it’s my early gender transition period (I have just completed my first year of HRT!), and I feel like staying low until I can sense the confidence to travel by myself anywhere again, which might never really happen but I felt like taking it slow. I was a little nervous about this one: it’d be the first show since Brazil in December last year and the first trip out of European territory as well after starting HRT. Reason why I decided to enter British territory through Scotland and visit my bestie in Edinburgh before - and after - going, since Scotland authorities tend to be more amicable and trans-friendly than, let's say, the London airports…also seeing best friends before and after an event is a good way to be kinder to myself (and the obvious reason: I missed my bestie!!!).

Then Monday arrived, 5 days before the event, and I got really sick. Tuesday I woke up weak, could not even get out of bed. I took a shower, and I could barely breathe. Got back to bed, thought long and hard about it and then canceled my hotel booking - it was the last day to do so without being charged. I got up, it was 5pm already and I hadn't eaten. My fever reached a high point, so I took some meds and hoped for the best. Tried to start eating, took me an hour to finish the nice plate of food that my sweet roommate had left me in the oven that morning. By the time I finished my plate though, I started feeling better. Maybe I could go? Checked my temperature and the fever had vanished, my throat stopped hurting…It made no sense, but I suddenly felt great and I was not about to start questioning. I decided to leave it to destiny: I'd wait until the next day, and if I felt good enough by the time I woke up and that hotel room was still available, I'd book it again and go. 

And I did.

The only thing left was to finish printing my riso prints (1 day left for my flight!!!!): the studio I used to print was missing their magenta drum, which means I had to print the magenta, and then the black on top, elsewhere. So far, my prints looked more or less like this for the time being:

Which is a very cool work-in-progress look for something, but not really a finished product, unfortunately. :P

I have a friend at another studio who could help me, but to my bad luck their machine broke that exact day, so...I guess those risos are not happening for now. Which is ok, I'll be able to finish them soon when one of these places replace their equipment. It was just a little disappointing to not have the new art printed in the nicest way for TTB, but I have managed worst pre-event crisis than this before…

(this Castlevania one is black and white, so luckily it was able to be finished and I could bring it with me to the event)

I went home, reconfigured my files so they would print well as digital prints, and ran to my trusty print shop near home. The results were good, and I was then very happy to have those prints ready, and now I just needed to hop on that plane and everything would be good! Wouldn't it?

I landed in Edinburgh, took a hot bath and spent the day with my friend catching up and cooking and preparing myself for the double train trip to Harrogate. Had a good night's sleep, hopped on the first train for a very pleasant trip: the day was sunny and the northern England coast looked beautiful. Got out at York and caught my train to Harrogate. In half an hour, I arrived at that cute and posh-as-fuck little English town and I rushed to my hotel to start unpacking my stuff and my books and prints and get my supplies to mount my table at…WHERE ARE MY SUPPLIES!!? 

I had forgotten my backpack on the train. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

The biggest losses, besides my table setting up materials, were: my phone charger was in that backpack, and my hormone pills. MY HORMONE PILLS. That meant staying a week without them, and them going back and taking them again and dysregulating my body (I’d done that once before and damn it was fucking awful).

I spent half an hour trying to call the lost items number, to no avail. Then I came back to the train station and talked to the station supervisor who tried to help me (well, sorta, there was a weird bureaucratic limitation to his ability to process things), but it was too late to call the other stations and see if Leeds had my backpack (it was a very short train ride, so my odds were good). They told me to wait because the same train was about to pass by the station in 25 minutes. I was starving, so I had a shawarma next door and waited. Then the train got there, but my backpack wasn’t inside…We asked the driver about it, and he said that this train actually wasn’t my train. That my train was probably at the depot. The station supervisor shrugged and said something like I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do to help you, I guess. Then I asked him back if there would be someone at the station the next day, to which he replied Yes. But I won’t be here. I almost smacked him in the face, but I decided that it was enough for a day, and that I would come back early in the morning to try to reach Leeds again.

By doing all that I lost the time to set up my table that day, so I just came back to my hotel, sent a little message to my girlfriend about it and cried. She was a sweetheart and had a call with me and helped me calm down and get into efficiency mode again. My bestie also replied to my messages about it at this point: they were having a vacation weekend nearby with their girlfriend and they were driving, so they offered to pick my backpack up in case it was found the next day.

I was determined to not let that ruin my event, so I went downstairs to let my phone charging at the reception, and since it was too late to have food anywhere at this point, I just watched Bob’s Burgers in my room (thank God for cable) and ate the snacks I bought on the way back from the failed adventure at the station.

Next day, I got up at 6am and ran to the station. The supervisor that day was way more proficient: he did some detective work and got my number in case someone found my backpack at the depot. I went back to the hotel and had breakfast, by the time I was setting things up to go to the event he called me. We got your backpack! You just have to go to the depot in Leeds and grab it, it’s at the reception. Come down so I can show you where. (Mind you, none of this would be possible if the station wasn’t 5 minutes walking from my hotel and the event, but anyways) So I go there again, he shows me on Google Maps where the depot is. At the worst, I’d take a train to Leeds (about 40 mins) and a cab to the depot and I’d have my backpack. Perfect. I tell it to my friend, they’re like Don’t even worry, we’re driving, it’s only a small detour, we’ll grab it and give it to you tonight before the event party. Nothing Like having friends in this life. Baby I love you so much <3

With that crisis averted, I cross the street towards Thought Bubble with my big luggage full of prints and comics. I meet my lovely neighbors Miles and Erin, set up what I can and head out - 25 minutes before everything starts - to get office supplies and velcro tape to stick things to the big display panel behind me - rented from the event. May the Gods bless Harrogate, because never in my life have I found a sewing shop so easily. I come back, finish setting up the table (at this point the gates are open but there’s barely anyone in because, as in every event, the first couple hundred people to enter do it very slowly), everything looks good and under control, so I can just sit down…and breathe. My event is finally about to start.

The reason I’m sharing all of this here is to emphasize that it doesn’t matter in which point you are in your career, we all fuck up pretty big some times. Of course, this definitely happened because I haven’t been going to events lately and also because I still am in a fragile and vigilant emotional state due to my transition so I probably was a pile of nerves in that train by myself? Yes. But in any case, a mix of luck and experience made it so that I could actually make this event the experience I really expected it to be. I could’ve panicked when I got sick and decided to not go, I could’ve gotten frustrated when the riso prints weren’t a possibility anymore to the point of giving up, I could’ve done a bad job of setting up my table without my materials and be very sad about it for the rest of the thing. But it was nice to be reminded that, once I sit at my table - whether it’s at an event just by my drawing desk, I’m fully in my element again and none of that matters.

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So, from there on, I just had a blast. People were very cute to me, some already knew me from MIK and wanted to know what else I had there, some brought their own for me to sign, a lot of them came with the intent to buy it, a lot of people saw that Castlevania riso print and wanted to talk about riso or games or art, etc etc etc. Whenever I could, I would get up from my table and walk around - this was my objective after all, to meet some new people and make new contacts and feel part of the scene again - and that led to really really fun and engaging talks with Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou, Sean Philips, Alison Sampson, Cé Simonis, Becky Cloonan and especially Michael Conrad - which is possibly the sweetest man on earth, or at the very least a very strong contender for the title. It felt really good to be reminded that I’m there already with everyone. That I’ve done the thing, I know the people, I know my craft, I don’t need to hide and feel like I’m starting again with every new comic. And that meant a lot, I feel so much more ready and confident to work on my new book again.

Later on Saturday, my bestie and his girlfriend joined me for the party which, between being flirted with here and there, storming the enormous and fancy men’s bathroom with a bunch of queers, dancing to Depeche Mode and just having fun with my friends, was a great little night.

My party look was giving “JamieMcKelvie designed character but with a skirt” :3

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Sunday repeated Saturday’s energy, but with some more free time to roam around since general movement was slower. Way less queer people, more families for sure. Oh yeah, this is probably a good moment to shout out something incredible here: I SAW MORE TRANSFEMME PEOPLE IN THOUGHT BUBBLE THAN IN PRIDE, and that’s just *chef’s kiss*. Amazing. So anyways, where was I…oh yeah: despite the slower movement, I sold out by 3pm so I just went to do my rounds afterwards. It’s hard doing weekend shows because it feels like you don’t have enough time to talk to everyone you want to - which is one hundred percent true that I didn’t talk to a LOT of people I wanted to, but somehow Thought Bubble felt just right (or maybe it’s just good calculation on my end of how much stuff to bring). In terms of events, it’s one of the most fun I’ve attended to date, and it feels like a big event due to the names attending and its importance to UK comics, but also very accessible and intimate. It was expensive to get there, but it’s definitely entered my map for events to attend in the future.

THE END!

TL:DR 

Under rain or sunshine, I love comics :D

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Recommendations, or

→ My TB comics haul with names and links (and comments on the ones I’ve read so far):

From top to bottom, left to right:

• What’s the Furthest Place From Here Vol.1, Tyler Boss, Matthew Rosenberg and Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou. This is a rare Declan Shalvey cover edition, according to Hassan - which is who I bought it from;

• Still, an illustration collection from the master Sean Philips;

• The King’s Story and MMXXI Becky Cloonan was an incredibly influential artist for me just when I was good enough to draw but wasn’t really set on a visual style. I’ve bought all her mini comics and zines, and I think nobody draws hotter knights than her;

• Faster, Jesse Lonergan, very cool book in the most you-have-to-tilt-your-head-when-you-say-it sense. It’s suave comics. It’s not often that I enjoy comics that go for style over substance, but this one has a really cool use of language that got me;

• It’s Lonely At The Centre Of The Earth, Zoe Thorogood, I guess this one has been discussed to exhaustion this year so I’ll just say I liked it a lot and made me shamefully cry on the train back from York to Edinburgh;

• Out of Style, Dewi Putri Megawati, This book is the cutest thing I’ve ever read and everyone should as well;

• Art cards from Rumbi and Alison Sampson;

• Midnight Sun and I Had a Friend At The Edge of The World, Cé Simonis, Beautifully written, printed and rendered Riso zines, these might be my favourite things I bought at TTB.

That's it for this one! The actual November issue will arrive in two weeks, and more comics analysis. Until then, godspeed, you beautiful baby angel.

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As always, be kind to yourself :)

BYEE!